New question

by Jen Lee Reeves on July 7, 2009 · 5 comments

in 2009, Questions

The girl, her brother, her uncle and I were walking to the car from the pool when she asked:

“Mommy… When are you going to have an arm like me?”

I looked at her matter of fact and said: “Sweetie, I’m never going to have a cool arm like you. You’re special that way.”

I don’t think she really liked that answer… But I think we’ve had so many opportunities for her to meet other kids with limb difference that it has her thinking hard about her arm and the special world she lives in. It’s another moment where it is kind of hard for me. I’ve said it before — she has to deal with her differences for her entire life. I’m just a bystander. I think we’re moving into a crucial time of development. If Jordan can remain proud, confident and able to identify her difference and how that doesn’t change her abilities in any way… We’re going to be okay for a while. I pray I can help lead her the right way.

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{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }

Nina July 8, 2009 at 4:31 am

You are such a wonderful Mommy! I dread that day….I’m teary just thinking about it :(

Crista from Kentucky July 8, 2009 at 5:50 am

When we talked about going to Camp No Limits next summer and all of the kids that would be there who would have an arm that looked like his, Keenan asked if his sister would be going as well. I told him she would. He asked, “So, next summer, Carmen’s will have a little arm like mine?” :-) I agree it is a very crucial time to instill confidence in these precious children!

NerdyMom July 8, 2009 at 10:06 am

Crista and Nina — it’s a powerful thing raising our kids. I think we’re all going to do the best we can. I have to admit, I’d felt relieved Jordan hasn’t been asking questions until recently. It’s coming… And I think I’m ready to offer as much guidance I can. I’ve also recently tried to get Jordan involved in the conversations I have with younger kids who ask Jordan what’s going on with her arm. We’re at the pool a lot and Jordan’s not afraid to start playing with a kid her size even if she doesn’t know him or her. So we get questions a lot. She’s still shy to respond to the questions… but we’ll get there. I’m sure of it.

Lisa July 8, 2009 at 5:58 pm

Jordan is one of the most confident kids I know. She certainly keeps up with big bro! You guys are doing a great job, so keep doing what you’re doing and she’ll be just as awesome as always. I love your answer and know that you and Randy are good role models for us on this great adventure. Give that little stinker a hug for me and Cameron too, of course!

Tricia and Haylee July 10, 2009 at 7:17 am

I love when they ask when we are going to have what they have. I often tell her I wish I did but that God Choose her. We make sure we always keep Haylee Confident, proud.

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