Subtle staring

by Jen Lee Reeves on June 19, 2007 · 4 comments

in 2007, jordan, June07, Link, Little Arm, Mommy Thoughts, Prosthetic, Stares

When you walk by Jordan when she wears her myo, she looks a little muscular on one side — the prosthetic is a little wider than a standard little girl’s arm. Then you have to look a little closer to notice the arm is permanently bent at an almost 90-degree angle. Then you notice the hand — it’s very doll like. And since it’s the summer, it’s also strangely white compared to her other tan arm (I swear I use sunscreen, she just tans easily).

Now that Jordan walks most of the time, I have time to enjoy walking a bit more. I look around more to make sure there aren’t any dangers for Jordan to walk into. And since Cam is attending new school for the summer, there are a lot of new faces to see and meet. So kids do double takes, adults stare just a little… Standard stuff. I just wish more people would feel comfortable to ask what’s going on. It took almost half of the t-ball season for parents to feel comfortable enough to ask what happened. The funniest reaction: “I’m so glad it wasn’t something like cancer!”

I guess every new stage for Jordan is a new stage for me as well. I interact with the public a little differently. I’m very comfortable talking about Jordan. I also thank children who ask what happened to her. I thank grown ups who are brave enough to ask as well. I just hate grown ups who stare. I really hate grown ups who try to get away because they don’t have the nerve to ask.

I heard about a new term on a blog recently: Disablism. It’s like racism, ageism, sexism. There’s a growing discussion about how disabled isn’t the end of the world and more people need to lighten up. My brother-in-law left this article out for me to read the last time we came to visit. Look at the lead picture. It’s fantastic. Jordan’s arm doesn’t define who she is and I just wish the uncomfort that follows people who see her with or without her prosthetic would fade away. If I could, I’d put Jordan in her “Dude. Where’s my arm?” shirt every day. It defines our attitude. Get over it folks! Look at her! She’s incredible. She’s beautiful. She’s JUST RIGHT!!!

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{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }

BethGo June 23, 2007 at 11:49 pm

Yes she is perfect!

I like you J. Will you be my friend?

Let’s be pals in this forever.

Greg June 28, 2007 at 5:53 am

I really enjoyed reading your blog Jordan is very lucky to have a loving mother like you. I agree she is perfect just the way she is! I hope you have a great day.
Greg
http://www.rehabcounselor.com

sweetney September 26, 2007 at 5:42 pm

Hi there! i love me some nerds ;)

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