Born Just Right

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Skin drama

August 30th, 2010 · 2010, Prosthetic

I won’t post a picture… because it just isn’t very pretty. But Jordan’s skin is breaking down from all of her prosthetic use this summer. She’s had rashes before, but the one she has on her little arm is pretty painful. It’s bumpy… and lumpy… and we’re using Desitin to cover it at night to help dry things out. We have to cover her little arm with a sock to make sure the diaper rash cream stays on her arm and away from her face and eyes. Jordan thinks it’s kind of funny. I’m hoping she won’t need the cream for much longer. Each morning she wakes up and clearly feels itchy and uncomfortable.

So far, she doesn’t equate the rash with her helper arm. She thinks the bumps are bug bites… And I let her think that. I don’t want her to connect something negative to her helper arm. So I’ll use the “bug bite” excuse for as long as I can.

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Festival Fun

August 29th, 2010 · 2010, Music

We continue to have amazing adventures each weekend. This weekend we spent time with our friends Tim and Renee and their awesome son and enjoyed a ton of music at St. Louis’ inaugural LouFest music festival.
Randy and I have gone to a lot of music festivals in our time together… But we’ve never been able to take the kids out of town and enjoy a long and fun music fest as a family. Sure our small town has had a few events, but when you live in town, you can run home and get away. When you go out of town, you focus on the music. I think the kids liked it. Jordan was EXHAUSTED as we drove home. She slept the entire way. Best moments of our music adventure include dancing around with the girl, seeing all kinds of friends and watching Jordan play with R so he would laugh. I love how the sun was setting on the kids when I took the picture at the top. Sunny kid smiles are the best.

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Showing pride

August 27th, 2010 · 2010, Football

I visit a local team spirit store at the end of each summer to prepare for the football season. I usually find a chance to take the kids to at least one football game to support the University of Missouri’s team. So I let them dress up. This year I found a couple of really cool things – one for Miss Jordan and one to show our family’s support for Jordan and our team.

Jordan LOVES her new dress. It has a Missouri Tiger in the front of it. I bought her a new rubberband that is covered with team symbols and colors. Today she wore it all to school along with Tiger socks and her shiny black shoes. Ahhhh. Stylish team spirit.

So I took it another level. I found super cool customizable team decals that show a little stick family that clearly likes Mizzou to put on your car. How great is that? To make it even more fun… I customized the little girl decal to have a little arm just like Jordan! When I started cutting it, Jordan tried to stop me until she realized why I was cutting the left arm of the girl. Then she reminded me not to cut the right arm since she has a hand on that side. It’s great to know she thinks she needs to remind me that she has a hand.

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Keeping so busy!

August 25th, 2010 · 2010

Jordan is the busiest kid on earth (and so is her brother). In the last two weeks she attended a super fun Pinkalicious tea party, started soccer, got to go to a St. Louis Cardinals game AND the Magic House. She had SO much fun. To add to it all, she’s fighting naps at school and got to go to a free downtown concert with us this evening. I think sharing all of her adventures are best told with pictures.

The princess experience:
Pinkalicous Tea Party
Jordan bumped into a group of old friends (these two girls were in preschool with them from the time they were infants until Jordan was almost three years old). This was a really similar experience to her birthday party back in December. That’s probably why Jordan acted like she was in charge. She certainly had fun.

First soccer lesson:

Jordan has gone to many soccer games and practices for her brother. But she had her very first one and did SUCH a great job. She listened, she learned and her coach was super impressed. So was I!

Cardinal’s game:
Cardinals 2010
We got to go to a St. Louis Cardinals game thanks to the kids’ Uncle Barry. The kids adore their uncle and Jordan was super excited to play with him. He had to move away from St. Louis a few years ago… but he comes back as often as possible to play with us and his old friends (many who we adore as well). Jordan was goofy during the game and thought it would be okay to turn on the high pitched girl scream anytime the crowd cheered. But we all had a good time anyway.
Cardinals 2010

A trip to the Magic House:

Magic House - Aug. 2010

I snagged a membership to the Magic House this year because both kids are perfect ages for this super fun spot. Jordan and her brother explored, pretended and climbed all over the place. Jordan was brave and even climbed up and down a huge beanstalk. (She was very proud.)
Magic House - Aug. 2010

Finally – tonight’s concert fun. I caught her dancing… a very silly dance to Big Smith. For some reason there’s no audio… but she was SO silly. That’s how things are these days. She goes from amazing to silly to exhausting every hour or so.

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If you can’t say anything nice…

August 19th, 2010 · 2010, Growing

I’ve found I often clam up on my blogs when I’m under stress or overwhelmed with my mommy world. It’s too bad because there are so many supportive moms out in the blog world. A couple of weekends ago, I followed many of my online and “in real life” friends who attended the BlogHer 2010 conference in New York City. I also participated in a couple of online conversations where moms who couldn’t attend could talk on twitter. I was following #bhah and #HomeHer10 hashtags on Twitter. (If you don’t know how that works, I’m happy to explain if you’d like.) I’ve also found incredible mom support through the group Sammy’s Friends. I wonder why I don’t jump in and complain a little from time to time.

Life with Miss Jordan these days have come with a solid number of challenges that come with a four-year-old who is strong willed and confident. I’ve said this before, I don’t want to take that away from her. I just want a little bit of my sanity back.

While I was recovering from my knee surgery, I needed to rely on my mom for a good portion of time while Randy was teaching journalists in China. For some reason, the mix of grandma and a mom who couldn’t walk very well led to an extremely rebellious little girl. I reached my limit. So I decided to borrow a behavior trick Jordan’s school uses: The Jewel Jar.

When Jordan does something really well, she gets a jewel from one jar and puts it in the other. Simple things like eating dinner politely, going to bed without screaming and coming home from school without a fight gets her a jewel. We’ve used it for almost two weeks and I’m feeling positive that this might be helpful.

Jordan is clearly growing up (she demanded that she carry my purse today)… and It’s tricky for me to react properly every time. It’s tricky to not fight over silly things. But after having a conversation with some other Sammy’s Friends kids, I realize we’re all better off being open and saying: AHHHHH! Help! My kid is strong willed and confident and RUDE! I’m trying as hard as I can to get rid of the rude and keep that strong will and confidence. (Wish me luck.)

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Vacation memory: A view into the future

August 8th, 2010 · 2010, Vacation10

I went straight from vacation and into knee surgery, so I’m still going through all of the video and photos I took during our adventures this summer. I found this video that I had to share.

Jordan and I were hanging out on the rocks near one of our favorite coves in Maine when Jordan found a rock that looked like a cellphone. She started talking on her phone and having imaginary conversations. She didn’t want me to shoot video of her… but I snuck a little moment:

I can’t stop laughing every time I watch.

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Free play vs. Scheduled play

August 6th, 2010 · 2010, Mommy Thoughts

When I grew up I had a friend who did everything. She played piano, she danced, she did sports. I thought that was really cool but I never got a chance to play with her because she was always somewhere doing one of her activities. I had one thing. First it was dance, then piano, then vocal lessons. I only doubled up with activities when I also joined a children’s choir and I was in 6th grade by then. I only did one thing at a time.

I told myself that my kids would only do one thing at a time as well. That opinion changed when Jordan came into my life. I started to focus on skills and activities that could enhance Jordan’s skills. She showed a lot of interest in dance before she was two and needed to work on her balance. So when she was 2 and a half, I put her in dance. When she turned three she had a chance to take part in equestrian therapy which is really great to help build her core strength. I couldn’t say no to that. Now I’ve signed her up for four weeks of soccer. It’s 45 minutes for four Saturday mornings. It will happen while she’s taking dance and before equestrian therapy starts up for the Fall. Honestly, I’m wondering if we have to skip equestrian since I also have Jordan’s brother, Cameron, in soccer and piano… and possibly a recreational flag football team (non-competitive in every way – it focuses on skills). In total, I could end up with each kid taking part in three activities a week.

Trying new soccer shoes

Crazy? Yes. Very Crazy.

It hits a little closer to home when you see articles like these that claim I should just ignore my kids. I agree that I should put the technology away more often… but I’m not totally convinced that unstructured play is completely removed from my kids’ lives. A little bit of structure and free time seems to make sense. My kids both seem to be better behaved when they run around, especially Cameron. And I would love for them both to try different activities and see what they like the most. So far, Jordan loves dance and horses and Cameron is really enjoying piano and soccer. I want them to learn, play and participate in activities where they interact with other kids outside the structure of school. But with all the running around, will worry about articles that say I’m doing it all wrong. But to me, I feel it’s right for us.

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Helper Arm Buy-In

August 6th, 2010 · 2010, Prosthetic

Jordan’s on track again. She was rude and obnoxious after returning to regular life from a long vacation and a week with her grandparents. To make things more challenging, I’m still healing from knee surgery and Jordan’s dad left to teach journalists in China. Luckily my mom arrived to help me care for the kids and get Jordan back into her normal, sweet self.

She has thrown tantrums over just about everything… but not her helper arm. She’s added it into a daily patterns before and after vacation. I think I’ve figured out why we have some serious buy-in with her arm.

First, it’s because it’s pretty. So very very pretty. All that princess action makes her proud to wear it. It isn’t my style, but that doesn’t matter one bit. I need her to love it and she does love it. Second, it’s because she can use it. Check this out:

I challenged Jordan to draw with her helper arm when we got to school one day this week… gave her a little instruction to hold onto the paper (or coffee filter, whatever works) and she did a little drawing. It turned in to mostly a scribble but she tried to write a few letters in the mix. It was awesome.

The more she uses it, the more she realizes it’s a useful tool. That’s the other reason why she’s really buying into it. She’s growing logic. I realize she’s four and wants to rebel against everything I request, but I think she’s seeing real purpose to her helper arm. I don’t require a time limit on her use. I just expect her to wear it at the start of every day at school. At home, she uses it when I see a need, but it isn’t required. She’s great to using it. She loves having an elbow. I’m so happy for her.

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Slowing Supermom

July 28th, 2010 · 2010, Mommy Thoughts

My friends say I’m an overachiever. They’re probably right. But when I realized the running and excercise I’ve loved was leading to a lot of  extra knee pain that I’ve dealt with for years… I finally decided to get it looked at. It turns out I tore my ACL and meniscus in my left knee a long, long time ago. Possibly six years ago. Apparently I’ve picked up the running habit while using a really crummy knee. I can’t wait to try it with a healthy one.

But that will be in four to five months. Last week I had major knee surgery and now I’m seeing the world as a mommy in a little slower pace. And Jordan isn’t thrilled.

She is thrilled to return to school this week after being out of town for more than a month.

I’ve been able to pick her up from school and snag her brother from camp, make dinner… and then physically collapse. No trips to the pool, no playing in the backyard, no trying as hard as I can to refocus Jordan’s brother from his new Harry Potter Wii game… I am taking a late evening nap! Work, physical therapy, kids… I’m tired.

I’m looking forward to making a rapid return to the bending-knee world… but for now, I have even more respect for those who deal with physical challenges every day. Mine will improve and I know I’ll be back on track before December. I raise my glass of water and bottle of ibuprofen to the many people I know who never complain and always live happy and strong days.

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Vacations like these don’t happen every day

July 22nd, 2010 · 2010, Vacation10

Jordan is the luckiest girl in the whole world. In the last two months, she’s had the chance to sleep with Dinosaurs in Chicago’s Field Museum, shop on Michigan Avenue, climb rocks along the Maine coast, play with a lobster, meet a new and special friend in Maryland, explore the Smithsonian Museum of Natural History, ride a carousel on the National Mall and play under and over waterfalls in the North Carolina mountains.

A Day in DC
That doesn’t even include the many family and friends we’ve had a chance to see along the way.

Jordan and her brother have spent so much time together that I actually think they like each other from time to time. They’ve actually slept in three different beds together in the last three nights. Last night they were so tired, they didn’t even try to challenge each other. They just passed out. Heck, they woke up this morning and actually played together and never attempted to wake us. That has to be a miracle in some form don’t you think?

We were very very busy since we left Maine. First, we drove to Maryland. Jordan got to meet a little girl who I’ve really wanted her to meet for a long time. They’re about 8 months apart in age and I knew they’d love each other. We only got to play for a couple of hours, but they were pals pretty quickly. Jordan didn’t want to leave… But we had plans to meet up with her uncle at the Smithsonian Museum of Natural History in Washington, DC. The departure was sad, but I’m so glad they got to hang out.

Sad farewell

Jordan had a pretty darn good time at the museum considering she missed a nap. I’d say she missed more naps than she took them during the vacation.

Naps or no naps, Jordan was up for all kinds of adventure when we traveled to the mountains of North Carolina. She got to hike and climb and explore all kinds of waterfalls and rivers. I swear she has no fear. She didn’t want help and she wanted to do everything her brother was doing. It was stunning and exhausting to try to make sure she was safe.

Mountains Day 4

Mountains Day 4

Mountains Day 4

We had an amazing vacation. Jordan got to explore, have fun and do things she never did before. We loved it. I know Jordan had a ton of fun.
This week she’s spending time with her grandparents while I have knee surgery. It’s a rough week for me, but I know Jordan’s having all kinds of fun.

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Vacation happiness

July 9th, 2010 · 2010, Travel, Vacation10

Jordan likes to be in charge… That’s been obvious for a while. But when you spend 24-7 with my girl, it becomes more clear how dominant she wants to be. And to be honest, most of the time I enjoy it. During our yearly trip to Maine, Jordan’s been climbing the rocks like she owns them. She’s biking with her bike and with our trail-a-bike with happiness and power. She’s also enjoyed every bit of sun and fog and everything in between. Has she napped enough? No, not at all. She was so tired today, she took a nap late in the afternoon without anyone asking her. We’ve kept busy and active. The dominance is really mainly an issue when she’s so tired, she wants to be in charge of irrational things. (Usually during loud and ridiculous fights with her brother.)

Maine 2010 - Day 7

We capped our trip to our favorite coastal land with a bike ride with Jordan trailing behind me. She calls it a “two-bike.” It’s really called a trail-a-bike. Either way, she loved riding all over the place with the rest of the family like a big girl. No training wheels.
Maine 2010 - Day 7

We all grabbed a bite at our normal stopping spot (this was our third or fourth year biking on this trail) and enjoyed the views of the Androscoggin River. I even remembered to pack our small kites… so the kids got to giggle about something new this time around.
Maine 2010 - Day 7

All in all, we’ve had a fantastic time with my parents. Plus, the kids were extra brave. This picture with lobsters proves it:
Maine 2010 - Day 6

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Camp No Limits 2010

July 3rd, 2010 · 2010, Camp No Limits

Jordan, Cameron and I had a really great time this year at camp. First, there were SO many more kids this year. Second, there were SO many more parents. AND there were many more activities.

Jordan came away from the experience with a firm ability to zip zippers!! And she’s better at working on buttons and shoe tying. I’m sure she’ll have shoe tying down by next year. The kind of pride that comes from those kind of life skills are awesome.

Cameron was the only sibling… so hopefully we’ll have more next year. He still had all kinds of fun with the campers – there were many more boys than girls. Jordan was the youngest of three girl campers – and by the end of camp, she really wanted more little girls. Luckily one of the volunteers brought her daughter over two evenings in a row. Jordan won’t stop talking about her new friend. We’ll certainly have to get them together to play soon. Jordan really did love her older girl friends and they were SO awesome with her.

The camp started out really hot. Luckily a rainstorm cooled things off and it stayed awesome the rest of the time. There were a ton of activities, catapult, golf, baseball, swimming, biking, arts and crafts and even archery. The kids with upper limb differences got to learn archery with their mouth! How cool is that? Jordan was a little small for it all but the folks who put on the clinic helped her feel like she participated.

I’d like to share a big thanks to everyone who put the camp together. Especially the Ridder family who made sure this camp came to Missouri last year and made sure it continued this year. I really think this camp has a chance to continue for many years. The next challenge? To help raise enough money for the camp so all kids with limb differences can attend. It would be incredible if the many kids I know could participate with their families. It is really a meaningful experience. Especially when you can watch your child share what he or she knows with peers… And those peers can share as well. I really think the parents learn a ton as well. Expect to hear me planning fundraisers later in the year!!

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Camp complete!

June 30th, 2010 · 2010, Camp No Limits

We just got back from camp and we had a lot of fun. Cameron and Jordan had great experiences, enjoyed a lot of outdoor time AND made a bunch of new friends. I have a zillion photos and videos to share, but since we’re headed out of town tomorrow for our yearly trip to Maine, I can’t work on that until I’m packed. In the meantime, you can check out an article about camp in the St. Louis Post-Dispatch. You can also watch this video:


A big thanks to Bethany Mollenkof and Stephen Deere who came out to see our special camp!

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Let’s go!!

June 25th, 2010 · 2010, Camp No Limits

I should be packing. I really should.

We’re very excited to head off to Camp No Limits this weekend. It’s in the woods and offline. If I can get away for a moment or two, I’ll share a photo from my phone.

If you’re curious about the camp, please spread the word about my Helpers 4 Haiti project. We’re trying to give a hand… or a foot for Haiti! I hope we can keep it going past our camp this week!

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She’s a fish

June 21st, 2010 · 2010, Swimming

Today it all clicked. Jordan got brave. She jumped into the pool a whole bunch of times. She dunked her head into the water and finally let loose and swam. She isn’t using her arms to swim yet. But she’s kicking and going places in the pool! She loved it so much she wouldn’t get out of the water. It was awesome. I’m so proud.

To makes things more exiting, her new and fixed swimming arm will return in the mail tomorrow. Hopefully we’ll get it in time for her swimming lesson! She already has a lot to share!

(By the way, her brother was also really awesome. He figured out how to do handstands in the water, forward and backward summersaults. He swam in the deep part of the pool too… which has been a big deal for him. Go Cameron!)

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